Musical Thoughts.

I've been consistently working out with my roommate for about two days now. I know that's not much, but it's better than nothing. We've been trying to keep up with our workout plans. Since I've quit crew, I really need some form of exercise. I can see myself GROWING in all the WRONG places.

I've noticed a slight trend in depression from all of my friends, including myself. Well not all, but at least a few. It's not even that we know what's wrong. There's nothing exactly wrong.

I guess in my own situation, I just feel tired all the time and I don't want to really talk or do much. I don't know if it was because of reoccurring frustrations I've had with this boy since... forever, but I think that situation has ended now. Maybe that's why I've been feeling a little better than before. I think it's also because I haven't been happy with myself lately. I'd also like to point out the gray and gloomy rainy weather, which then turned into gray and gloomy snowy weather.

I am so sick of winter. I hope spring comes along quickly, hopefully in early March. I want to run outside and enjoy the sun. I want to be able to not worry about slipping and falling because of the rain or snow. I don't want to wear a jacket!

So I've been listening to some music lately and getting into the mood for artists such as Carolina Liar.

Carolina Liar.

Maybe it's the mini depression I'm going through, but it really makes me think and feel... better I guess? Have you ever heard a song that just made you feel something? I don't mean like it's a good song because you like listening to the beat or the lyrics, but it makes you feel something different. It could be your mood or just something.

I first heard Carolina Liar - Show Me What You're Looking For on my friend's iPod on the way back from a trip to Vestal, which most of you probably know is where Binghamton University is. I was coming back, feeling kind of down, and here we were, stuck in traffic for hours and this song came on. I think I almost teared up because I just felt that sudden rush of emotion from what I went through that weekend.

Now I'm just rambling about the past...

On a lighter note, here's something funny I read today:

Picture Perfect.

So I couldn't sleep again and I don't know why.

In order to pass my time, I decided to look at the pictures I've been tagged in on Facebook, starting from the last page and moving towards the first. Here are some of my conclusions: I was in better shape, I had so much fun, I miss people, and I haven't been taking any pictures lately.

Honestly though, I saw so many moments in my past that I really enjoyed. I may not have been able to remember the exact details, but I remember the feelings I had during those moments. It felt good and it makes me want to do something other than just go to class and work. I want to make new memories and use my camera for once.

Another thing I realized was how people come and go. It made me kind of sad that I was so close to so many people at different points in my life and now we hardly talk. I know I don't make an effort to reach out, but really, what am I supposed to say? "Hey I know we haven't talked in five years, but let's hang out!" Awkward.

I'm not that distraught about the whole thing though. I just think it's a little upsetting that we form so many connections to people in our lives and we will probably never see or talk to them again unless we make that conscious effort.

Later today I'm supposed to meet up with a friend in the city. The kind of random and weird part is that I met her online when I was probably twelve or thirteen. I don't remember how, but we've been talking for years. I know what she looks like and I'm sure she's not some forty year old man who's going to rape and murder me. I'm looking forward to seeing her but at the same time I feel... strange? I guess I just don't know what we're going to do or talk about. I don't want it to be awkward. I think we'll be okay though... I mean, we have a lot of catching up to do.

I think I'm getting sleepy now. I'll write more in the evening... or tomorrow... or never.

Good night.

Sleepless Snowy Nights.

For one reason or another I've ended up unable to sleep the night before classes. I haven't updated in a while due to my laziness, but I'm hoping to change that... slowly.

All it has been doing around here is snow. Despite the snow day we had last Wednesday, the weather decides to be a jerk and snow again tonight. The only perk about the new fallen snow is that the gray slush will be white fluff once again. Two things that make me dislike snow: lack of suitable shoes and weird parking.

The newest craze that I've been playing around with has been Tokbox, which has probably been around for a while. Banana and Joaquin introduced it to me last night and it's pretty entertaining. I spent the entire evening at D's playing around with Tokbox instead of writing an essay for Chinese.

Tokboxing.

This past weekend was Chinese New Year and Valentine's Day. I thought it was kind of nice that the two fell on the same day. Instead of saying I have no valentine this year, I can say that I celebrated Chinese New Year. Genius!

I watched the movie Valentine's Day Saturday night. It's one of those romantic comedies that aren't too bad. Although I don't think I'd watch it again right away, it was pretty funny and entertaining. There were some surprises as well as predictable parts.

I decided on skipping out on my 8:20 AM class and just going for my office hours at 11:20 AM. I'm a pretty lenient TA that lets the students go after they sign in instead of staying for 15 minute sessions, which gives me time to finish my essay. I think I'll wake up at 10:00 AM tomorrow and look pretty.

Life has been... decent. Lots of surprising turns in my opinion.